My Growing Years - Band with Phyllis

Today is the celebration of life of my junior high BFF, Phyllis (1961-2015). 

Phyllis and I reconnected on FB two years ago. I asked her if her parents ever told her I stopped by the house a long time ago. Thinking back, it was just after my mom passed away in 1989. Her parents had moved and lived near my parents' house in West Hills. They never told her! I sat in their living room having probably the longest conversation I ever had with them in my life. I know I would have wanted her 411, but for some reason I didn't get it from them. 

In junior high, we were inseparable after meeting each other in West Valley Youth Band, Jr. For some reason mom decided I needed to be in band. I remember the day we went down to Canoga School of Music. Out came a glockenspiel and we brought it home. I didn't question why, it was something I could play since I had played the piano. I didn't have to taken lessons. Phew! I was a year ahead of Phyllis, but because we were in both band and orchestra, we saw each other daily. I was playing the flute (band) and the oboe (orchestra). Not to mention we shared lockers (with many others) and hung out in the band room before and after school. 

Fast forward to last August, when I was able to nail down some us time in Seattle, we discovered that we both ended up studying graphics art in college. However, our roads, leading up to that weekend, were completely different. While I had my share of angst going into high school, eventually she dropped out. I didn't know that. (Maybe I did back then, but forgot.) I knew she went to cosmetology school. I remember visiting her at Montgomery Ward in the mall, where she studied. That must have been in 1978, since I went off to SFSU the next year.

When I visited Phyllis' parents, I learned she was up in Washington and owned her own hair salon. As time passed, every once in awhile, I would search the Internet looking for her. I am so thankful she found me. I'm thankful that "Gysin" is still a rare last name and if people want to find me on Facebook, they can. (Our last name was always mispronounced and/or misspelled.) 

I knew Phyllis was in remission when we got together. There was a part of me mourning, but for our past. I brought our junior high yearbooks (fading rapidly) and my Slam book. We had so much fun going down memory lane. In the Slam book, she put down someone else as her BFF. She laughed and said we must have been fighting. Oh, junior high girls can be cruel. Probably! But our fights ended quickly, "in a fight in 2nd period, then by fifth period BFFs." 

Phyllis mentioned her favorite band was Chicago. There it was in the Slam book from 1974, her favorite band, Chicago. All these years her love for Chicago never waned. I appreciate that she re-awakened my love for Chicago. It was a soundtrack to my growing years. When I went to see them in concert this year, I was thinking of Phyllis. 

Today I think of Phyllis and how much joy she brought to my growing years. She said I was the same sweet Laurie, she too. She was a gentle soul. Phyllis, I love you and am thankful our paths crossed in junior high.

P.S. In 2011. I wrote about Phyllis in a blog entry, click to read more.

7 Years Later - Remembering Mr Gysin, Mr. G, Lloyd Henry

Devery, Kathi, and Laurie, at Lloyd Henry's Memorial Service on January, 17, 2009.

Here it is seven years later on the eve of the anniversary of my father’s passing. I have the honor to share, with her blessing, what has remained hidden up until August this year. My dear friend, Kathi, had a memory to share at my dad’s memorial, but we didn’t have time provided for friends to share.  She pointed this out to me in her email and we were aware of this when we planned his service.

Kathi stood next to me as I spoke about my Dad at his memorial. She was my rock/support and helped me get through the wavering parts. She was there again this last August at the WHCC Music Reunion, when I started to cry, as I made a botched attempt to tell everyone I wanted us to get together for the right reason.

Kathi and I met when we were in fourth grade, when the twenty year legacy of my parents as Ministers of Music began at Woodland Hills Community Church. Here’s her memory…

Good  afternoon. My name is Kathi Mowers-Moore and I am so very thankful for the opportunity to be here to share in the celebration of Lloyd's most wonderful life.  

My first memory of Mr. Gysin, Mr. G., Lloyd Henry, was of him walking into Smith Lounge here at WHCC on the first day of the elementary school (4 - 6 grade) choir practice upon the Gysin's arrival to church. Birdie was working with us as a new choir and I have a vivid memory of practicing a song about Zaccheus. Lloyd popped in with his booming heart, voice and laughter joining into song with us. I will never hear that song without thinking of this first moment when my life became eternally blessed by the Gysin family. That day I met Gary, Birdie, Lloyd and Laurie who would become one of my dearest friends and soon after I would meet the rest of the family; Randy and Jeff. From that day on, the Mowers, Ayers and Gysin families would become intertwined forever.  

You see, the Ayers, Gysin and Mowers parents were the leadership of the youth activities of the church: Kathy and Dick Ayers with the Junior High Group; Bob and Jeanne Mowers with the High School Group; and Lloyd and Birdie coordinating all six choirs and all musical productions of the church. It was very simple: Sunday was church day. After Sunday school and church (sometimes us kids would ditch Sunday school and walk to the grocery store), my brother Scott and Doug Ayers would end up either at the Ayers or Mowers house and Laurie and I would end up either at the Mowers or Gysin house for the hours between church and youth group. We would then come back to church with whichever family we were with and Doug, Scott, Laurie and I would be squirreled away in the Kindergarten Classroom here at WHCC while our parents were busy with youth group activities. 

Through these many years, Lloyd and Birdie always welcomed me into their home and hearts as one of their own and I have great recollections of waking up in their home to song; hearing breakfast cooked to song, hearing Birdie call us from the front porch in song; always song and hugs and laughter. Lloyd and Birdie always trusted us and celebrated us being kids: I learned how to roller skate by careening down the hill near their home on roller skates and Lloyd patching me up afterwards.  

During my teenage years, Lloyd became a rock, a center of gravity for so many of us. We always knew that we could return to that rock, either from a hard week at high school, a hard quarter at college, a new love or a broken heart, to be consistently greeted by a hug, a tight squeeze and a big kiss on the cheek.  

As both Laurie and I went off to college and into our adult lives, I often would return to Lloyd and Birdie, that center of gravity, ever to be held close in love. Ever interested in both sharing updates of their lives and hearing of my own.  

Lloyd was probably the first person that joyfully debated Theology with me; laughing with me about important and divergent perspectives of scriptures. I thank him for these discussions and debates and return to them in my head regularly.  

Lloyd and Birdie were two of the first people who I introduced my future husband Bill to and I was so appreciative that Birdie was able to join with her entire family at my wedding the summer of 1989.  

As our lives have carried us away from Woodland Hills, returning to the center of gravity and love of Lloyd was always a homecoming; whether it was arriving for Christmas to find Lloyd's famous fruitcake or attending midnight Christmas service welcoming any moment I could have with the family, or hearing through my parents updates on Lloyd, he always has been and always will be dear in my heart.  

I am thankful that both of my children, Mikayla and Travis have been held in the loving arms of Lloyd. I am thankful that through Lloyd I met Laurie who I will always hold close in my heart.  

I will be a better person if I remember to love as grandly as Lloyd always loved each of us. In Lloyd's last Christmas card to me he shared what I find to be a great reminder to us all.  He said  

"Before I forget, please have the finest each day and be healthy, wealthy, wise and busy."  

Thank you