Inspiring Women—How Many People Does it Take to Make a Difference?

In 2006, I formed two bellydance troupes, L.A. Tribal and Sisterhood of L.A Tribal. The latter, a student troupe, was dissolved in 2007. We had a motto, “Inspiring Women. L.A. Tribal.” I love the idea of women inspiring each other.

Recently I was at Starbucks and saw a journal they were selling during the holidays called One. The front endpaper said, “One of the greatest gifts you can give yourself or anyone else is inspiration,” reminding me of the L.A Tribal motto.

About a week later, after a late night driving (it started pouring rain on the way home) down to Fullerton, to dance with some ATS sisters, I walked in the door and found a flower arrangement (see photo) in the kitchen. I opened the card to discover the flowers were from friends who have been very supportive with my dance endeavors this year. They wanted to wish us a Merry Christmas and included, “Thanks for inspiring. . . .”

I get gung-ho about ideas but when others support me; there’s no stopping me. My latest endeavor is to participate in the “Love Your Body” campaign with some of my belly dance sisters in 2010. I am so excited to be surrounded by inspiring women (and the men who support them)—it’s infectious!

Learning From the Great Depression

My Dad passed away last year at 90 years old. He grew up during the Great Depression. He was eleven years old, in 1929, when the Stock Market crashed.

While growing up, my Dad was not involved in the day-to-day activities with us four siblings. Mom did that. He was focused on making money so we had food on the table, shoes on our feet, and music lessons, to name a few.

One Christmas, in recent years, my Dad gave me a gift and made the box it came in from scratch. I wasn’t sure if he didn’t want to spend money on a box, couldn’t find a box to fit or he figured he could make it himself. I suspect it was the former. I know at the time I thought it was silly of him. Yet, when it came time to throw away the box--I couldn’t.

Being a Depression baby is what made my Dad “stretch a buck” or “live within his means.” Sometimes we forget how much we don’t really need to get by.

I try to reuse everything that comes in the house. I tend to be a clutter-freak (and my husband is the opposite). There’s a delicate balance between holding onto something that I might eventually need and throwing something away.

“Use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without.” 
-- New England proverb

The End Is Where We Start From

2009 ends soon. This month, December, I have spent connecting with old and new bellydance friends. Doing some drumming, some dancing, and some watching. I even completed attaching fake flowers to hair clips (see photo). Flowers in the hair is an ATS costuming staple!

• Sat., Dec. 5 - Rahana/Velvet Gypsy Drum Circle in Santa Monica. Went to see my drummer friend, Jeff, perform with “Ensemble El Hadi.” Brought my frame drum.
  
• Sun. Dec. 6 - Holiday Hafla in Northridge. My ATS students gathered and performed. It was co-hosted by me, Edara and Amara. My drummer pals, Jeff M., Jeff S., and Larry, also joined in at the end for an impromptu drum circle.
  
• Tues., Dec. 8 – Alex Spurkel’s drum class and my Level 2 & 3 students (and guests)
  gathered for a night of improvisation.
  
• Thu., Dec. 10 – Tribal Dance Jam night with Sooz’s students in Fullerton with Margaret.
  
• Sat., Dec. 12 - “Twisted Gypsy” with their drummers at a Hip Hop Pow Wow at The Onion (a UU church) in North Hills.
  
• Sun., Dec. 13 - the Dance Garden “Holiday Fiesta,” a student recital in Atwater Village. My dance sister, Soy, and her students performed ATS.

In November, I was invited to Soy’s ATS open practice for performance. She was preparing her students for the Dance Garden recital. Each week we gathered and improvised. It was shortly thereafter I was inspired to end public classes and begin ATS open practice instead.

Tuesday, Dec. 8, was my last night offering classes to the public. Starting in January, 2010, I will facilitate ATS open practice for dancers who already know ATS. This will provide my students a place to dance together and most of all a chance to connect with other ATS dancers in the SoCal area.

“What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from.”
– T.S. Eliot

Photo of bellydancer ©Sorin Constantin

How to Make Wire-wrap Jewelry: Teaching Teens and Young Adults

On Sunday, I participated in a Holiday Boutique Fundraiser at the church in Woodland Hills, CA, where my parents used to be the Ministers of Music. I brought my entire inventory of handmade wire-wrapped jewelry. My two customers were Lily and Lisa. I told them both I would teach them how to wire-wrap.

When I first learned how to wire-wrap jewelry, I made necklaces and earrings for my bridesmaids in my wedding. I loved making jewelry and it was affordable. Co-workers (all women) wanted to learn how to make jewelry, so I taught a class during our lunch break. Years later, I had an opportunity to teach wire-wrapping to high school students, girls and boys, at my husband's continuation school.

My classes were modeled after the class I took at a local bead store. I would provide a kit with all the supplies needed. Students got to pick the color of their bead (crystal). After one hour they would have completed a necklace to take home.

Lily and Lisa have inspired me to teach wire-wrapping again!

Scissors & Tape - Why Some Rules Are Necessary

Today my husband and I are preparing packages to ship off to family in Germany. I grabbed the scissors and tape and remembered a rule we had growing up in the Gysin family regarding the latter.

The scissors and tape were kept in the hall closet. After one walks through the front door, turn right down the hallway. On the left, after passing the main closet (where we kept the vacuum, coats, and bags), there were four sets of doors—two below and two above. These items were kept on the top left bottom shelf.

We had trouble keeping the scissors and tape in the closet. They would grow feet and walk away. I remember many times getting into trouble for not returning them to their place. I was told, more than once, if I didn’t return, them I didn’t get to use them.

As the Gysin kids became adults, it was no longer the scissors and tape that went missing. I can still hear my Dad complaining about how someone borrowed an item and didn’t return it. He’d get on the phone and ask for it back. I never did hear if the item in question got returned.

In the Miller household we have numerous rules. My husband constantly hears from me, “New rule, ….” Rules are usually put in place when someone didn’t follow through. Lately, I’ve had to make rules for myself so I won’t forget things. Sometimes I have to pay a penalty of monetary value, so I actually suffer the consequences if I break them.

Having rules makes life easier when living with others. Even though some rules are annoying, there’s usually a valid reason. We know them and we know what happens when we break them.

Thank you for all the support and friendship

This is a gift from an artist friend I have known for about 10 years. This is a stamp with the word “Laurie” written in Chinese. I love it. I can’t wait to stamp the back of all my handmade cards with it.

My friend and I have drifted apart. About a month after my Dad passed away, she lost her Dad, then her Mom a couple of months after that. We were both a strong support for each other before our loss. When we’d see each other, we would talk about our family dynamics and business left to executors. Over the past several months we’ve stopped talking to each other. I thought she needed space.

Last month, I decided to seek the help of a counselor. I felt like I was cranky all the time--my expectations of friends and family were not being met. Why was I feeling this way? The counselor helped me understand that I’ve been anxious. Note, when one is anxious, one becomes irritable. In my case? CRANKY! Since then I’ve relearned how to relax. It actually feels good. More importantly, I’ve learned not to take things personally.

The card with the gift read, “… thank you so much for all the support and friendship this year.” Even though we’ve drifted apart, it’s not personal. I hope to reconnect with her soon.